Friday, July 20, 2012

Becky's Vacation Review

My family went on vacation last week. We woke up (way too) early, boarded a flight, read some SkyMall, landed, boarded another flight, drove in the right side of the car on the wrong side of the road in...

beautiful St. Thomas!
I had never been to the Virgin Islands before, but let me tell you, you've got to go. But just in case you need some convincing, check out Becky's Guide to St. Thomas (below)! She really knows what she's talking about and even helped me plan my vacation!

Becky's Guide to St. Thomas

Big Kahuna Rum Shack

Food: 3 stars
    I enjoyed a jerk chicken flatbread, however, it was really nothing special.
Entertainment: 5 stars
    Our family was treated to a dinner show! I'm a broadway fanatic, and I was even impressed. The show that night consisted of a man who pretended to get fired, lose his cell phone, and refuse to leave the premises. I honestly almost thought it was real. His accent had to be fake, but I must say he did a really great job of shouting the f word in a Jamaican accent. The cops did a fantastic job showing up with a great light show and then later executed an unpredictable finale! Also there were a few chickens running around which made me appreciate how fresh my flatbread was. Bravo!

Night Kayaking - "See the Seas Between Your Knees!"
Adventure: 3 stars
Entertainment: 5 stars
Uniqueness: 5 stars
Seasick factor: Joanna
    What a cool concept! These people made clear canoe/kayak boats, and then lined them with LED lights. We took a tour at 7 pm around Frenchman's Reef, and it was a lot of fun. Honestly, I didn't think about how disruptive we were really being (the goal was to see nocturnal sea creatures... but then we turned on our lights and they all went away), but if you don't think about that, you're good. The view of Charlotte-Amalie was gorgeous-- all twinkly lights-- and our tour guides were very knowledgeable about the Virgin Island's history and culture. Definitely a unique experience.

Hotness: 5 stars
Mother-Daughter Bonding Experience: 5 stars
Being Identified as a Tourist: High
Entertainment: 5 stars

    Sarongs are always a good idea. They make you look like a tourist, but a sexy tourist who definitely did not buy it for a cheap $8. Also, you can run around and feel like you're in a Sandals ad.

Fun: 4 stars
Germophobe Threat Level: Orange
Barf Forecast: 100%
    Totes fun. Probs barfing. Also, if you can't help but picture the possibility of kissing every person who has sucked on that snorkel you just rented, you're better off buying your own (one that actually fits your face and doesn't make you snort salt water through your eyes!).

Fruitness Level: Fresh
Colors: Like a sunrise
    We stayed at the Marriott on the island and had the. Best. Desserts. Below is a chilled chocolate hazelnut cheesecake-like thing garnished with chocolate and a strawberry. The crust was amazing. It was sort of like an Oreo and a brownie had a beautiful love affair. The next photo is of mango sorbet. Think of the best thing ever, and you've got it. Seriously, folks, I do not joke about food.

Dumb Americans
Embarassment: High
    I do not consider myself a dumb American ( and I hope you don't either). However, LOADS of them flock to St. Thomas! (So does that mean that dumb Americans go there, and therefore I am a dumb American? Rhetorical question, of course...) They were in the infinity pools, spilling their drinks. They were at the bars, getting sloshed, and sloshing stuff. They were on the boat excursion, being Woo Girls. They were everywhere. Below, my dad is pretending to pose so I could take a picture of the genius who was standing on a wall overlooking a dropoff into the ocean. Slick.

So anyway, kids, this is how I feel. St. Thomas was great! If you like the beach, something different, interesting accents, and don't mind getting a little seasick, this is the place for you. However, if you hate the fact that sand gets everywhere, and generally don't like fun, it's probably not a good idea for a vacation. Enjoy some more pictures. Happy vacation!

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